& The Truth Is....

Look at me....What do you see? Think about the way I act...What would be a word to describe me.
I bet the words unhappy, sad, or fed up with life never crossed your mind. I bet the thought of Akayla Anderson being unhappy never crosses anyones mind.
Happy, always smiling and laughing, loud, nice; All compliments I get daily. I'm going to be truthful though, I smile all the time to hide the pain, I'm always laughing to keep from crying. People only see the physical and material things. Yes, I have nice clothes, My parents drive nice cars, and I live in a fairly nice house but those things don't make me happy. No one ever thinks to look beyond the things they can see.
When we see someone smiling we assume there happy. When we see someone who has all the things a typical teenager wants we assume that they have a perfect life. WE'RE ALL GUILTY OF THIS. We come to conclusions before even getting to know a person and taking the time to figure them out.
I bet no one knew that I only paint my nails Black because it's the only color that always matches my mood. I bet no one knew that every morning I wake up and ask myself " Why am I still here" I bet no one knew that I cry myself to sleep everynight. I bet no one knew that when I do fall asleep I dream about not waking up....I bet no one knew these things, not even the people that I'm with all the time because I'm so good at hiding it.
When you look at me you see a happy face, you see a 15 year old girl with a " Perfect" Life, a bright smile, and a good future; But when I look at myself I see the exact opposite. I see a 15 year old girl who has to take the responsibilities of a 25 year old, I see a girl who's just fed up with life, a girl who just wants to be  "Happy", a girl who wishes that she didn't have to go through all the things that she's going through right now, a girl who just wants all this to end. To be over with. A girl who just wants everything to stop, but who realizes that it's not that easy.
Believe it or not, I'm not the only one. I'm not the only one who smiles all the time to hide the pain, Im not the only one who acts happy all the time because she'd rather people ask why she's so happy, Rather than why she's so sad. Im not the only one who feels this way.
Majority of the people that you come in contact with on a daily basis could be just like me. The pretty preppy girl who the guys are all over could be the girl who conteplates killing herself everynight. That one kid who sits in the back of the classroom, that everyone things is goth could be the happiest person in the world.
Since no one walks around carrying a sign that says " Im Hurting " or " I'm Sooooo Happy ", We can't just look at someone and assume how there really feeling inside by the way they act or how they dress.
Do I look like I'm upset...No. So we can't just assume that someone's happy because there smiling, or that someones emo because there anti social and they wear all black. We can't just assume any of these things without actually getting to know the person and taking the time to figure them out.
Now of course none of us have M.D or Ph.D at the end of our names, so we can't diagnose ourselves or anyone else with depression. But, Honestly does it really take a doctor to find out if someone's hurting?
Next time you look at someone and just assume something about them, actually take the time to figure them out. If you can take the time to assume then you can take the time to get to know the person. The world would be so much better if we all did this. But, changing the world has to start with US.